When I think about World Breastfeeding Week, my mind goes not to campaigns or statistics, but to the conversations I've had with hundreds of women over the years.

First as an NHS midwife and now as Lead Midwife at Cocoon Healthcare, I've supported families through pregnancy, birth and early parenthood. The conversations I have time and again are rarely about whether breastfeeding is the right choice — they're about mothers questioning themselves and believing everyone else has found it easier. If I could have one conversation with every expectant mother before her baby arrived, these are the things I'd want her to know.

The first is that breastfeeding is a skill that both mother and baby learn together. We often describe breastfeeding as natural, but that does not mean it comes naturally. There is an expectation that because our bodies are designed to breastfeed, everything should simply fall into place the moment a baby is born. In reality, feeding is something that develops over time, with babies needing to learn how to latch and feed effectively, while mothers are learning to recognise feeding cues, establish positioning and gain confidence in their own instincts. When things don't click immediately, it doesn't mean anyone has failed, it usually means they are experiencing something that is far more common than they realise.

We also need to help new mothers understand that many feeding challenges are completely normal. Throughout my career, I have supported women worried about painful feeding, babies who won't latch, concerns around milk supply, expressing, mixed feeding, cluster feeding and possible tongue tie. Yet many parents arrive feeling embarrassed to ask questions because they believe they should already know the answers. Too often, they compare themselves to carefully curated images on social media or stories from friends who appear to have found breastfeeding effortless. What those comparisons rarely show are the tears, the uncertainty and the learning that takes place behind closed doors in countless homes every single day.

One of the biggest changes I have witnessed throughout my career is the amount of information available to new parents. While access to information has never been greater, access to reassurance can sometimes feel much harder to find. Mothers often tell me they have spent hours searching online, reading articles, scrolling through forums and watching videos, only to come away feeling more confused than when they started. Conflicting advice can leave parents questioning every decision they make, particularly during those early weeks when they are already recovering from birth, adapting to interrupted sleep and getting to know their baby. Information has an important place, but it can never replace compassionate, evidence-based support from someone who can listen to your concerns and understand your individual circumstances.

A piece of advice I'd love to give every new parent is that asking for help is never a sign of failure. Throughout both my NHS career and now supporting families through Cocoon Healthcare, I've seen time and again that parents who reach out early often find feeding challenges much easier to overcome. Small problems can usually be addressed before they become overwhelming, whether that's making a simple adjustment to positioning, offering reassurance that a baby's feeding behaviour is completely normal, or simply taking the time to observe a feed and listen without judgement. Those moments may seem small, but they can completely change how a mother feels about herself and the feeding journey she and her baby are on together.

I also believe we need to be kinder to ourselves when our feeding journey doesn't look exactly as we imagined. Pregnancy often comes with carefully written birth plans and hopes for the weeks ahead, but babies rarely read the plan. Some mothers exclusively breastfeed, others express, some combination feed and others decide that formula feeding is the right decision for their family. Those choices are deeply personal and are influenced by many different factors. My role as a midwife has never been to judge those decisions, but to ensure parents feel informed, supported and empowered to make the choices that are right for them and their baby. Feeding your baby should never become a measure of whether you are a good mother.

Perhaps more than anything, I wish every new parent knew that they were never meant to navigate those early weeks alone. Previous generations often had wider family networks and communities that naturally shared knowledge, practical help and reassurance. Many parents today are experiencing early parenthood in relative isolation, turning to their phones for answers during one of the biggest transitions of their lives. That is why skilled support matters so much. Sometimes what changes a family's experience isn't a complicated intervention, but simply having someone take the time to listen, answer questions, provide reassurance and remind them that they are doing far better than they think.

As we mark World Breastfeeding Week, I hope we continue to celebrate breastfeeding and the many benefits it can bring. Just as importantly, though, I hope we remind parents that breastfeeding doesn't have to be perfect to be successful, that challenges are far more common than many people realise and that asking for help should always be seen as a strength rather than a weakness. Every mother deserves to begin her feeding journey feeling informed, supported and free from judgement, because when parents feel confident and cared for, babies benefit too.